I lost a very good friend. One of the most loyal I ever had. And not the death kind of loss..well,at least I killed the friendship. There is something about knowing someone for more than two years and accepting them for who they are that allows you to expect a certain level of trust.
She was one friend I could travel the road less taken for, because we were more than friends; sisters. I even pictured myself as a bridesmaid at her wedding.Time and again I saved our friendship because I valued her. That is the same reason I didn’t tell her about her boyfriend’s clandestine advances towards me. To save her from the hurt, the stress and most definitely the heartbreak caused when someone you trust betrays you. I have been down that road before,it is not easy.
Anyway as it is,everything blew up. Right in my face and I had no control. It really has nothing to do with the guy in question because I had him blacklisted long ago, It is her. I was prejudiced long before her confrontation. She chose to listen to everybody’s version of the story and finally came to me with a pre-judgemental mind. Anyone who knows me knows I do not play Kangaroo court, especially when I’m right.
And the friendship blew up largely because my bitch hormones were high on life. Two years and no trust? Not even a live recording of his confession could convince her of my innocence. I had to. You know those lawyer instincts that depend on evidence? I have them. Blame it on watching Suits; Jessica Pearson is my idol.
Someone once told me that when it come to the boyfriend-best friend situations,follow your heart. I guess she did the expected, but truth eventually comes out, huh? I will be long gone when that happens though I’d love to give that ‘I told you so’ look. That reminds me of back in the day when a guy I was seeing hit on my roommate. I was mad as hell because she gave in but I chose to dump them both. Still the guy never admitted. They never admit, do they?
Life’s trickiest situation is who to save. Sometimes we dump the boyfriend then discover the best friend is a devil wearing prada. Other times we end the relationship even when the guy is innocent (raising one eyebrow). We may keep them both and hide our head in the sand like an ostrich, assuming the danger has gone away. Bottom line is there underlies no perfect judgement. Women were gifted with intuition which magically works all the time unless when crowded with love.
I write this after shading a bucket of tears (we are women,it’s allowed). It is great I have no exams till Tuesday, this article is the last broken piece I have picked up. We are all raised with values. Mine never allow me to invade a friend’s territory. Friendship is one of the world’s strongest pillars. The friends we make will see us through our lows, celebrate with us when we hit the highest moments and keep us sane when minds go blank, all these cannot happen without trust. I keep that in mind daily.
I will choose my girls over any guy,any time. I will keep those worth saving and ditch those unfit for the bill. It is life,you snooze,you lose. You lose,you snooze.
This is just an archive. No hard feelings are attached thus I am not getting back at anybody.
What a way to begin 2015!