The Former Best Friends

Best Friends

In standard five, we used to write a composition about ‘my best friend’. I recall creative writing was the worst class event I could imagine of and I couldn’t write anything sensible beyond two sentences. How does someone create something that doesn’t exist! Most of my friends considered this as torture and dropped their education here. But then ‘my best friend’ was easy because it was already in the text book so it was only copy, paste and edit, something which am perfect in.

The best friend was that one with mutual benefit. They buy you sweets and biscuits then copy all your assignment as it appears including your handwriting, and sometimes your name. We and our best friend were all very innocent, nobody knew anything like alcohol, promiscuity, drugs, name them.

That was then. Fast forward and think where and who that best friend is now.

My friend, Mike was a very silent fellow then but now he is a dude you meet for the first time in life, not after a long or some time, and before you know each other by name someone passing by will think you have been friends since independence. This is the dude who meets a girl for the first time in life and after two hours they have undergone a complete cycle of the usual Kenyan relationship-fell in love, had sex, heartbroken and left each other and now they are officially ex’s!!! During those times relationship was just a page in the Saturday Magazine, but now he is experiencing it in 3D!!

Best FriendsWhile the girl is somewhere in her room updating her status on how ‘all’ men are dogs Mike too is somewhere in the pub chatting with other envious dudes how cheap this lady is- he can only compare her with a Yu Simcard. Or something cheaper than that, maybe a sweet…mmh. Think of anything else cheaper again…that one, you are right. Thumbs up.

This boy is now an alcohol guzzler but in someone’s eyes he looks very innocent- more than a policeman before the vetting committee. So innocent he looks that, seemingly, to him the word Napoleon appears like a certain comedy show in Mozambique which you must explain using diagrams and illustrations -also siting references- for him to at least have a clue. Thanks to the second coming of Jesus. We will see all these!!

Nowadays, friends have changed and best friends are not always best. By this time you could have realized that friend and enemy have almost nothing to differentiate them. Men keep friendships until ladies do them part. I don’t know for ladies but men know it well that friendship ends with women and never allow your friend to even know whether you are in a relationship…just for the sake of your friendship.

No free SMS or MBs to Whataspp your girlfriend? Well, accept and move on. Don’t use a friend’s phone to do that. You did it? Am sorry for you!! Tomorrow check his messages, I bet the conversation with her will be at a level you can’t help. You will not repair anything because, basically he is one of your best, now beast, friend and he knows your weakness from where he will demolish you. In this case, a prophet is not necessary to determine your fate. You see yesterday’s call logs and text conversations past midnight and remember how sorry and apologetic the girl was to you today at 10am for being sleepy and ‘not seeing’ your calls and text which you sent at 9pm. How else does someone know he is single? My friend, open your Wi-Fi and search for a new device before your battery is low.

Anyway, that is just the other side of the best friends. If you have a true one, call it a blessing…

©Hesborn Nyagoko




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