THE ELEVENTH COLUMN: Why Are We So Fake?

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fake

I have been having this single thought for long: “Why do we live fake lives?”

Why?

I don’t know what inspired this question in me. I think somewhere on the social media streets, especially between Facebook and Instagram, I realised that so much around me, around us, is fake. From the “awesome friends”, “rich people food”, “woke up like this” to the MCMs and the WCWs and the “love things”. All fake. Fake. Fake. You take a million selfies (which is a sickness), find one, and edit it with all the photo editing apps and then write a whole paragraph of hashtags and unrelated stories of how you love yourself. Just for the likes. And when one pic doesn’t get a said threshold of likes you get stressed. Fake. And these people, I ask while hurting, are the future?

Why do we spend so much time yapping about how our lives are awesome, or about how in love we are, or about how we had a good day? Why do we waste our lives trying to be awesome in the virtual world, while in the physical, what we are is stressed, unhappy, worried, lazy, and to some extent useless?

Yes useless. All that time we waste trying to look happy, contented and high-living could be focused on actually achieving useful things.

We fake love for others. We fake caring. We fake friendships. We fake achievements. We fake laughter. We fake knowledge. Everything. We are fake in class. Fake online. Fake in church. Fake in the market. Everywhere.

Someone told me the 20s are the new “mid-life crisis”. I laughed. But I now get it. Yes. If you’re in your twenties, you are in a crisis. A crisis of finding out what you want to do with your life. Finding out who you want to be. A crisis of lacking money, needing love, companionship. The whole world doesn’t really believe in you or understand you. It is a major life crisis.

In a crisis, solutions need to be found. In our 20s, we should be finding ways to solve the problems in the world. Coming up with ways to make tomorrow better. Kicking out bad leadership and retrogressive ideas. However, we are not doing that! Instead we are building on mediocrity. Narcissism breeds cynicism. Cynicism breeds mediocrity. We pretend we are so cool. We fake it so much to an extent we believe it. We want to be big so bad that we forget we are not and instead of acting and working on being great, we lie to ourselves. Then time comes and we realize we aren’t it. We aren’t what we have been faking all this time. And when we reach the dawn of this realization, it is too late. Then we become skeptical of ourselves. We start regretting the wasted time, the faked moments and the stupid parties. Thereafter, we give up on ourselves. We give up to just existing. Mediocre lives.

***

“Why are we so fake?” an innocent soul asks.

“Because we are struggling to appear awesome!” A knowing soul answers.

“Can’t we just be ourselves? Can’t we realize we are already awesome?”

***

Do you want to live a mediocre life? Such that when your time on earth is soon over you realize that you’ve done nothing but fake it with your friends, lie about your life and criticize the ones actually doing something.

“Me, I don’t have that awesome pretend life everybody seems to be having on social media. Mine is a slow, mostly boring life. For me each day is a struggle to better myself and leave this world better than I found it.”

Get out tomorrow and become someone. A real person. Notice the world. Notice the opportunities that you could use. Have dreams and do something to achieve them. Love your friends for real. Cut ties with fools who add no value to your life! Follow your dreams for real. Don’t smoke and get drunk when all you’ve achieved is being born to a well-off family or having a few cents from HELB. Don’t do stuff because people are doing it and you’ll appear less cool for not doing it.

If you want to be rich, be rich for real. By actually doing something. Start a business or something. Do something! Don’t force your richness by spamming peoples TLs with pictures of cash and “we be ballin’” captions. Change this world. Read a book. Learn something new every day. There is so much!

Don’t just exist and admire lives of others while faking (and messing) yours.Be yourself. That’s what this world needs. You.

***

“How are you?”

“I am busy countering yesterday’s success!” Mmh.

“You’ve changed!”

“As if I work hard every day to remain the same!”

 

Follow @DicksonOtieno

Column will be every Saturday at 11am.

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